Sunday, January 17, 2016

My Cute Schnookems, Norman

So I'm sure you're all wondering what the word "Schnookems" means. It is a word that we have created to describe my (not so) baby cow, Norman.

He is the cutest cow I have ever owned.

We,( I ),bottle fed him as a calf. He was less than a week old when we got him. At first the thought of bottle feeding my own baby cow sounded great! It would be like having a baby.
There he is! 

Look at my Schnookems. He got two bottles a day, one in the morning, and one at 2:00 pm.  As you can probably tell, this was the AM feeding, because I'm in my pajamas.  In this picture he was a week old.  

Today he is a little over 6 months old. My Schnookems is growing up!
This is Norman before his bottle.  He sees me coming.  He runs to the fence.  He bats his adorable giant eyelashes at me and says, "MOOOO!"  
After a feeding, this is what he would look like.                   what he would do when he had eaten all of his bottle, and wanted more.  He would lick, and nudge, and sniff me, looking for an udder.   
And while he was searching for an udder, he would smear milk foam all over me  .Mom thought it was   " cute ." Now he is growing up :(  Mom and Dad said that I had to go through an entire bag of milk replacer before I could stop bottle feeding him. That bag was never ending. 
I know what you are all thinking.
" Look how fuzzy he is!"  I know. He's cute. I'm glad I didn't decide to starve him as a baby. All of those bottle feedings wereworth it. Something funny I found out taking pictures of him is that he loves it. He loves the attention, and the people. It makes him feel like a superstar.
Look how sweet he is. Cute, little, schnookems, pumpkin.  We all love him. Mom says that he is going to turn mean, so I'm enjoying my sweet little boy while he's still nice. In case you didn't know, boy cows hit a point in their lives when, they decide that terrorising the girl that raised them, cared for them, and bottle fed them( ugh )was fun. He's turning. His subconscious was 
whispering "Cooommmee to the Darkkk Siiide."

 Choose life Norman!

Monday, January 11, 2016

A Glitch In The Matrix

A couple of days ago, I was babysitting my neighbors little girl for them as they took there boys out to see Star Wars The Force Awakens. I would be babysitting her from 2:00 until 7:30 (ish) . When the little girl found out that I would be watching her, she bounced, she danced, she squealed, and she sang with excitement.

 When the time came I grabbed our family go-phone (so I could talk to her mom if I needed to) and headed over. Little did I know that she had spent the previous day coming up with a list of fun filled activities to entertain us all that evening.

 Once I got there I was greeted with, " Mommy!!! Shelby's here! Oh, Hi Shelby! Come on in! I'm soooooo excited."  Once properly and rather enthusiastically greeted we went into the kitchen to say hello to her mom. When the boys and her parents had left she turned to me with a huge smile and said, "Come on Shelby! I have a whole list of things for us to do!" 

Wait, what? A list? What list? No one had said anything about a list.

She took me back into the kitchen and as promised, there was a list sitting on the counter. Still beaming, she read it aloud to me.

This is what it said:

1 Play outside

2 Play inside

3 Makeovers

4 Listen to the entire Nutcracker soundtrack ( What? Who does that?)

5 Play with the kitties

6 Dance and do ballet

7 Sing into her new mic that she got for Christmas

8 Eat a snack

9 Do crafts and art

10 Bake in her play kitchen and make cookies

11 Read a story

12 Watch her stuffed animals preform the Nutcracker

13 Watch a movie.

Can any of you guess what that movie was? Lets recap. Adorable 7 yr old girl. Loves My Little Pony. Loves the Disney princesses with all of her heart. Her favorite color is pink, and she loves doing makeup, hair, and nails. She is possibly the sweetest little girl in existence. Do you know what that movie was now?

You guessed it..........FROZEN!

So as we were half way through the movie I got a text from my Mom. I looked down at the screen and I see a picture of a ferret. Wait, what? Hold on, let me tell you what my little sister Andie got Christmas.

We come down the stairs Christmas morning, and we see a hug ferret cage in the middle of the living room. My Mom says to her, " We got you a ferret! He's not here yet, but her should be here by the second week of January." And here we are three days after Christmas and i'm getting pictures of him.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love Frozen! It was great the first 5 times I saw it. But I was pretty happy to have an excuse to ditch the singing snowman.

So, I text back and was like, "What's that?" My Mom proceeded to tell me how they had dropped by the pet shop and the ferret was there, ready to be brought home.

They got the rat, I mean the ferret, home and he decides that biting people was fun!

Me and the little girl headed over to my house to see how the ferret was doing. We got there and my Mom said, " Go on upstairs! He's already stealing shiny things."

We both ran up stairs and we saw the ferr- Wait. What was that smell? Something smelled bad. Like, REALLY bad. I walk over to the rat, ferret, whatever, and sniff him. Ack, ew, gross. It was him.

Apparently everyone knows that ferrets stink, and i'm the only one in the world that doesn't know that ferrets stink. Great. Now we had a stinking, biting ferret.

My brother and my friend came over that night.  Our friend claimed that the ferret was, "A glitch in the Matrix."

He was right. My sister named the ferret Frrt, ( Pronounced Fert ) after the stuffed ferret she has had for the past 3 years.

Frrt has stopped biting people now, and we are looking for ways to make him stink less. I had a great time babysitting, cant wait to do it again.

                                                                        Love ya'll,